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Name - Jesica
Age - 18

I am nothing but a drop.

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Resolve


"You have to make a choice between what is right and what is easy."
"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live."
---Albus Dumbledore

I've made my choice; I won't do what's easy. I'll no longer dwell; I'll live my life. And these are the reasons.
The reasons for my choice.

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Saturday, November 04, 2006

[::..Techie No More..::]

Yeah, so after this show I'm pretty much cutting myself off. I'm just sick of people. I mean, there are some that I can still stand, sometimes. But generally, I'm just done. I loved the time I had with Tech Crew but I cant handle it anymore. Especially some people, Marina's been my number one annoyance as of late. Leaving these guys means leaving Tech Crew which means I'll really have nothing to do except work but oh well, I'll get over it. I'm gonna miss Technical Theatre. I was really beginning to love it. And Ron all but promised he'd try and make sure I Stage Managed a One Act. Oh well, thanks for the thought Ron but I wont be around. Looks like Euchre during 6th hour is gonna suck. I wouldnt leave if I didnt have to.

I'm just sick of meaningless relationships. I rather be alone then surrounded by people I have no true connection with. I'm sick of one sided relationships. I'm just sick of my damn mask. I slipped into it again today. And I hate myself for it. I hate myself for the each with which I pretend to be happy and betray myself. I'm sick of it. So after tomorrow's show, I'm done. In the mornings I'll so to the library and I can go there during lunch too. The during early dismissal I'll go straight home. That means the only people I'll see are Jeremy, Shaffer and Sam. Jere and Shaffer during 1st and Sam at work. Yup! Sounds like a plan to me.

I'm getting back all the shit I have out and tomorrow I'm giving the Thomases back their SoulCal. Then I can sucessfully cut myself off. I wish I didnt have to work with anyone or see them in class, but oh well, what can I do? Thanks to Neylon I've gotten pretty good at avoiding topics I dont wanna talk about. Joy! I have to give that kid props I really do.

ttyl and better days,
---Jessica

"The things I've said to you, softly, in the dark..."
---Dan Wood as Bert Cates in Inherit the Wind

Alura - 12:12 AM